How Homebirth Changed My Postpartum Experience for the Better

By Leah Allen-Manning

Twenty minutes after my second daughter was born, I was comfortably lying in my own bed. I had just delivered the placenta. No stitches needed. “Are we really all done?” I asked my midwife. “Yes,” she assured me. I could hardly believe it after only three hours of labor. 

I held my baby to my chest, propping up my arms with my favorite pillows. She latched right away, but I looked to my providers for reassurance once again. “Looks good!” my midwife said. When I noticed my own hunger, my husband fetched food from our kitchen. As she ate, I ate. We had everything we needed.

My midwives and doula quietly cleaned up the room, dismantled the birth pool, and left me and my husband to have some peaceful time with our new baby. An hour later, they returned to do the newborn exam. Once they left for the day, I set my sleeping baby next to me in her bassinet and joined her for a nap.

This short interlude—full of small comforts, peaceful moments, and trust—set the stage for a restorative and restful postpartum period, mostly thanks to my decision to have a homebirth.

My First Postpartum After Hospital Birth

My first birth—a hospital birth with midwives—was a positive one, but the immediate postpartum left something to be desired. It was another fairly speedy unmedicated birth, but I needed stitches for a second-degree tear. Unbeknownst to me, I had also hemorrhaged. I only found out when I was reviewing my MyChart years later. This lack of communication was not surprising to me after the fact, since I had a hard time getting my providers to listen to me.

One notable example was when a nurse refused to take out my hep lock after birth, even though it was painful when nursing my baby. She told me I needed to pee to prove I wouldn’t need fluids. I did so, but she didn’t believe me. Crestfallen, I chugged as much water as I could until I could finally present her with my urine in a cup, feeling like a disobedient child.

This impersonal care did not set me up for further postpartum success. At home, I was confused and overwhelmed by caring for myself and the baby, despite support from my husband and my mom. I had misplaced the piece of paper that said how much and how often I should take medication. (One single piece of paper in a stack of pamphlets and guides they gave us!) As a result, I undermedicated myself and unnecessarily suffered through difficult afterpains.

When my anxiety and sleep deprivation reached a breaking point after returning to work at 12 weeks postpartum, I called the hospital number in hopes of reaching a familiar caretaker. Instead, I was filtered through a switchboard, voicing my most private thoughts to strangers. Ultimately, their only advice was to find a therapist, but every counselor on the list they gave me had months-long wait lists. I was on my own.

The Homebirth Difference

By comparison, my homebirth postpartum felt like many people were holding my hands along the way.

Recovery

My physical recovery was quicker and easier than my first birth, which I credit to my care team. My midwife instructed me to stay in bed as much as possible during those first two weeks. I lived in a three-story townhouse, so I was skeptical at first that I could avoid the stairs. But I took their advice to heart, shifting from bed to nursing chair, and that’s it.

My husband and toddler would come up to visit, but mostly I ate, slept, and fed my baby. And repeat! My midwives conducted the newborn and postpartum check-ups at home, so I didn’t even have to leave the house. Those two weeks were isolating at times, but I took the opportunity to bond with my newborn and prioritize my healing. This time around, I knew what to expect. I was well-stocked with postpartum care items and remedies for all my various pains and discomforts.

Breastfeeding

Breastfeeding my first daughter was a difficult, stressful experience. Following directions from the hospital, I stuck to a strict schedule for when and how long I fed her. When my nipples cracked and bled, the nurses gave me nipple shields instead of double-checking her latch. By the end of that first week, we had to supplement with formula so she would gain weight. Juggling both bottles and breastfeeding at every feed was logistically complicated and emotionally draining.

Preparing for my second birth, I wanted to prioritize a more positive breastfeeding journey. I took a virtual breastfeeding class and was the only attendee who wasn’t a first-time mom. I learned that by sticking to a schedule, I had been ignoring my daughter’s hunger cues. The training also encouraged me to focus on those first ten days. If I could make breastfeeding my full-time job for ten days, I would be more likely to have long-term success.

So when my second daughter was born, breastfeeding became my default activity those first weeks. When she woke up, I fed her. When she cried, I fed her. I was breastfeeding constantly, and I didn’t measure how long or how often she nursed. I was thrilled to discover she was pooping and gaining weight appropriately. We had a wonderful breastfeeding relationship until she decided to wean herself at one year.

Mental Health Support

I found a postpartum psychiatrist while pregnant just in case I needed support after birth. I didn’t want to wait months to see a provider like last time. Our first appointment was scheduled for a few days after my due date, and I held my daughter as I talked about how I was feeling over Zoom.

Having those appointments on the calendar was a real relief, since I knew I had someone to talk to who was looking out for any warning signs of postpartum mood and anxiety disorders (PMADs). I also knew I could text or call my midwives if I ever needed help. Ultimately I never reached a crisis point this time around, thanks to this strong support system.

Preparation and Support, Regardless of Where You Birth

While the homebirth environment did lend itself to many of the improvements I experienced, I believe that anyone can implement some of these tips to have a more positive postpartum period:

• Seek the comforts of home: Even if you’re not giving birth at home, you can still make a cozy, comforting environment. Bring your own pillows, food (if allowed), music, and lighting to turn your birth room into a peaceful retreat.
• Choose the right provider: Having a holistic care team who saw me as a whole person made all the difference. Don’t be afraid to switch providers if it doesn’t feel right. Due to insurance issues, I only started seeing my midwife in the third trimester!
• Find mental health providers early: Avoid the wait list. Find a provider as soon as you can, even if you’re not sure you’ll need one.
• Prepare for breastfeeding during pregnancy: Take breastfeeding classes, find a lactation consultant, and get yourself all the gear to make breastfeeding as smooth as possible.
• Prioritize your recovery: Don’t be a hero. Stay in bed and let other people take care of you. Your body will thank you.

My positive homebirth experience showed me that with adequate preparation and a strong support system, the postpartum period can be a peaceful time of recovery and newborn bonding.

---

Explore More PSI Resources:   

Connect with Knowledgeable Providers Using the PSI Directory

Breast- and Body-Feeding Resources 

Find Your Postpartum Community with The Climb